– 11 Min Read
Introduction
What is a Christian known for but ‘love‘? Love is the brightest characteristic of a disciple of Jesus (John 13:35). If a person is not marked by leading a life of love, then we are immediately concerned for the state of their soul. Paul tells us that you could do the most honorable and righteous things but if you “do not have love, it profits [you] nothing” (1 Cor. 13:1-3). This is because, in Paul’s view, without love “I am nothing” (1 Cor. 13:2). But what about when you are slandered by a fellow Christian? How are you to love brothers and sisters who speak evil of you? Luckily, the Scriptures have a clear answer.
“You Are Far Worse”
One of the truths we must first come to grips with is understanding who we are. We are sinners. We are prone to err and are fallible creatures. The first posture a Christian is to take is not defensiveness, but openness. We as disciples of Jesus are to be open to correction. Even though slander is a sin that God hates (Prov. 6:16-19), we first must examine ourselves before we engage with our brother or sister who is slandering us. As Peter said, “judgment” first “begins with the house of God” (1 Pet. 4:17).
We are reminded of what Charles Spurgeon famously said; “if any man thinks ill of you, do not be angry with him. For you are worse than he thinks you to be.” We can love our brothers and sisters who slander us, by remembering that we are no better. We must be careful to not fall into the same sin that they have (Gal. 6:1) and remember the words of Jesus.
“Do not judge, so that you will not be judged. 2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with what measure you measure, it will be measured to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”
– Matthew 7:1-5 (LSB)
Before we make haste to point out their sin of slander, let us take a pause and consider these things. Remember the words of James; “If anyone thinks himself to be religious while not bridling his tongue but deceiving his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless” (James 1:26). Again, this is the same sin the slanderer has slipt into and we must be watchful to not react in the same manner. There is much wisdom in being still and silent.
He who holds back his words has knowledge,
– Proverbs 17:27-28 (LSB)
And he who has a cool spirit is a man of discernment.
28 Even an ignorant fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise;
When he closes his lips, he is considered understanding.
Ecclesiastes refers to there being “a time to be silent and a time to speak” (Ecc. 3:7). Before we return the offender with a response we need to make sure that it is the right time. Being quick could lead to our stumbling and we need to guard ourselves from that. Again, this is all acknowledging the sinfulness of our flesh and how prone we are to wander astray. We must “be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19), because we acknowledge sin dwelling in us (Rom. 7:14-25). We are far worse than they say we are.
“God Knows The Truth”
Let us take comfort, dear friend, that for those hidden in Christ, God will not hear a charge brought against them (Rom. 8:31-35)! The slander that may be coming upon you is not a valid charge before God’s throne. God knows all things (Isaiah 46:10; Acts 15:8; Rom. 8:27; 2 Cor. 11:11; 1 John 3:20). If we are innocent God knows.
We can love the ignorant brother or sister by reminding ourselves that there is no evil they can do to us that will hinder us from Christ. There is no attack they may levy against us that will strip us from the Father’s hand (John 10:27-30). If Jesus commanded us to “love our enemies” and to “pray for those who persecute” us (Matt. 5:43-44), how much more should we love those who sin against us and yet are Christians? We must! Jesus said that it is by doing this that we are proven to “be sons of your Father who is in heaven” (Matt. 5:45).
When Potiphar’s wife slandered Joseph by saying that he tried to rape her, God of course knew it was a lie. There is no fooling God, no matter how much the slanderer cries “Sin! Sin! Sin!” But what we are to consider is that Joseph remained silent and the Lord “extended lovingkindness to him” in the injustice.
Now it happened that when his master heard the words of his wife, which she spoke to him, saying, “This is what your slave did to me,” his anger burned. 20 So Joseph’s master took him and put him into the jail, the place where the king’s prisoners were confined; and he was there in the jail. 21 But Yahweh was with Joseph and extended lovingkindness to him and gave him favor in the sight of the chief jailer.
– Genesis 39:19-21 (LSB)
And is that not the model of our Lord? When Caiaphas continued in “trying to obtain false testimony against Jesus” in order to “put Him to death“, “Jesus kept silent” as “many false witnesses came forward” (Matt. 26:59-63). There is much for us to learn from our Lord. We do not have to be so quick to defend ourselves. Most times, in the fast act to give a defense we often lose respect.
The truth is, sometimes there is going to be Caiaphas’ in our lives, who do not care for the truth. They have an agenda to seek and destroy all credibility in someone and invite all who want to join in the false witnessing to help get them there. But God knows. God knows what is false and what is true, dear Christian. Therefore, lead your life with integrity.
Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance…
– Titus 2:2, 6-8 (LSB)
6 Likewise urge the younger men to be sensible; 7 in all things show yourself to be a model of good works, with purity in doctrine, dignified, 8 sound in word which is irreproachable, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.
“Rebuke”
The last thing for us to consider in how we can love a Christian who slanders us, is how we should rebuke them. Our Lord laid down a protocol we are to follow in the life of the Church in Matthew chapter 18. After we have had a moment to meditate on our own sinfulness, we become reminded of what Paul says to the Philippians; “but with humility of mind regarding one another as more important than yourselves” (Phil. 2:3). When we are reminded that our God is watching and knows the truth, we then can begin the process of going to our brother or sister.
“Now if your brother sins, go and show him his fault, between you and him alone; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. 16 But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed. 17 And if he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as the Gentile and the tax collector. 18 Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven.
– Matthew 18:15-20 (LSB)
19 “Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven. 20 For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.”
Jesus is clear that we are first to go to the person who has sinned against us by ourselves. Far too often, Christians skip this first step and bring in as many people as they can. This is certainly the case with the slanderer, they have not approached their Christian brother or sister privately but instead spoke to others. We cannot fall into the same pitfall. We are to go to them privately first. If that point of contact is unsuccessful, then we are to continue to follow Jesus’ words.
Slander must be addressed, for Christians are not to be slandering each other.
Do not slander one another, brothers. He who slanders a brother or judges his brother, slanders the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it. 12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you who judge your neighbor?
– James 4:11-12 (LSB)
According to James when a Christian slanders another Christian, they are slandering the Law of God and by implication, they are slandering the “Lawgiver and Judge.” This Lawgiver and Judge is God and He is the “One who is [alone] able to save and to destroy.” Slander is a serious sin and far too often the church turns a blind eye to it. We should be deeply concerned for our brother or our sister who is slandering another Christian. By doing this, they are slandering God and judging His law.
Paul explains how we are to love one another in his letter to the Corinthians (1 Cor. 13:4-7) and in it, he tells us that love is “patient, …kind, …does not act unbecomingly, …does not rejoice in unrighteousness,” and “…believes all things.” All of these things highlighted are not compatible with the act of slandering another Christian. Slandering another Christian is a hateful act.
The Apostle John says; “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him” (1 John 3:15), “But the one who hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going because the darkness blinded his eyes” (1 John 2:11), and “If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen” (1 John 4:20).
One of the best ways we can love our brother or sister who is slandering us is by rebuking them. Not for our sake, but for their sake. If we are truly desiring to “win” back our brother (Matt. 18:15), then this will be done in love.
Conclusion
Loving each other is hard and it is especially hard when we are being wronged. Let us not become discouraged but find great comfort in the Scriptures, for God speaks to us! God wants us to glorify Him with our actions and that includes our reactions. Let us meditate on the word of God before we speak, for it brings calmness to the storm raging inside of us. Let us not grow weary of doing good, for our Father in heaven watches and will reward us on the last day. Dear suffering brother and sister, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Do not despair but trust in God for He will “repay” you.
Like a club and a sword and a sharp arrow
– Proverbs 25:18-22 (LSB)
Is a man who bears false witness against his neighbor.
19 Like an aching tooth and a slipping foot
Is trust in a treacherous man in a day of distress.
20 Like one who takes off a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar on soda,
Is he who sings songs to an aching heart.
21 If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink;
22 For you will heap burning coals on his head,
And Yahweh will repay you.